Quotes

•    Whats NEW about this year? I woke up with the same OLD hangover…

•    May your troubles last as long as your new year resolutions…

•    India’s tryst with destiny at midnight delivered a pumpkin

•    The problem with political jokes is that they get elected ~ unknown

•    “Power corrupts, absolute power corrupts absolutely”. I don’t understand how electricity can corrupt people… #timepass

•    “He is no lawyer, who can’t take two sides”. Only our Parliamentarians do better.

•    Only two more days to start work on the resolutions made last year.

•    Dear Anna, I have registered my boss for the “jail bharo” andolan.. Do you pick him up OR we arrange drop?

•    Kapil Sibal’s arguments on the “Right to Corruption Act” are indeed very compelling…. Pun intended !!

•    A spoon cannot understand the taste of the food it carries..

•    Christmas is when kids ask, and adults pay for it. Reservations are when Adults ask and kids pay for them !!!

•    Santa was a real person till he forgot a gift for Rajnikant

•    Reservation in everything is similar to the European union. No one’s sure about their own status… why dis quotaveri quotaveri di… Addi..

•    If Santa is a Clause, What is Banta? #faltuthoughts

•    I started doing nothing and haven’t finished yet

•    Shiamak Dawar has unveiled a new dance form. It’s called “Lokpal”. You take two steps forward, one back, three sideways, bend backwards, then one forward, two back,
•    bend forward, then one sidestep & two forward… then you look into the camera & holler whatever comes to your mind”… the confused audience just claps….

•    ATV ride.Midnite

•    welcome drink continues…is this the 7th?? or 9th??

•    Certes Board meeting

•    Dear Government, if this is the right answer, I surely must have asked a very stupid question #lokpal

•    But for the “give, take, share & snatch”, Delhi has the least corruption in the world

•    If Russia bans Gita, Delhi vows to ban Svetlana… We just won’t allow them to dangle on Delhi poles during this wedding season….

•    Success mantra – “either achieve greatness through deeds, OR, hire a good PR firm”

•    The written word, and the felt word, are two different expressions….

•    Laugh at your problems, Everyone else does…

•    Faltu joke suno….. If the sindhi who fell off the third floor is called “Thadani”‘ what’s the name of the one who fell off the top floor???? ….. ….. ….. “MARJANI”

•    Any great men being born in Bangladesh after India liberated her? No, only small babies !!!!!

•    Why all this fuss about kolaveri di????? We Punjus have been singing Maa Di, Behen di since 1483 AD

•    I found the word “Impossible” in the dictionary of the educated… Oxford ki kasam..

•    I need to write a book to realise I have no talent….

•    Today is Sharad Pawar’s birthday… In an unrelated news, Delhi turns 100 today as India’s capital….

•    “If Sachin is god, Sehwag is Rajnikant” -this comment made my day

•    If tomorrow never comes, what is today?

•    Yesterday – QSQT, DDLJ Today – MBKD, KLPD Tomorrow – MCBC Dekh tere Bollywood ki haalat kya ho gayee Bhagwan, kitna badal gaya insaan…..

•    The only reason you hate your birthday is because people give you odd gifts, scary cards with weird messages in them, and because you’re getting older. Anyway, Happy Birthday!

•    Boss – “How come you develop a rash every time I hand over your salary?” Me – “I’m allergic to peanuts”! (re-run)

•    We are born naked, wet, and hungry, and get slapped on our ass … Then things get worse. ~ Anonymous

•    Crisis gyan – “Finance the Optimist, and become a pessimist”.

•    the Cricket chirps all night, but doesn’t say anything meaningful…

•    Sachin was one Pawarful slap away… Marathi manoos to be motivated by the sardar

•    The Mistry is finally solved. All trucks to sport “ok, Mistry, Horn Please”

•    Dont speak, unless it improves on silence

•    US$ = Ab tak Chhappan

•    Dear Women’s lib members, how can women be equal to men? Can women walk the streets with a Bald head & a beer belly & still think that they are sexy?

•    Now

•    How soon before it gets too late?

•    Whose picture is this Ramesh Menon, junior Menon? or senior Menon when he was junior?? Very cute….if he is your son, u could get him a t-shirt that reads “If u think I am cute, you should see my dad!” :-))

•    The race ends, the road never does…

•    Ash karo….. from ‘Auntique’ to ‘Mummy’ …

•    Rahul (Dravid) is old at 38, Rahul (Gandhi) is young at 40… One did not shirk away from biting the leadership pill..

•    Slice it UP maya… let’s have four more parks.. statue-statue khelte hain…

•    On children’s day, the crown Prince takes on the queen mother & the court jester in UP

•    The Bunga bunga replaced with the full Monti… Italian crisis !!

•    “Everything that you Mount(batten), wont be British”.. Chacha’s advice on Children’s day

•    KIngfisher adopts new corporate jingle : “Where birds don’t fly, That’s where I’m going to be    And if you see I’m back the very next day    That is not me”

•    It is 111111, unless you are in the USA.. they prefer the MM/DD/YY format

•    STOCK TIP : “Short-sell all your liquor stocks. I am going off drinks for a few days”

•    “It’s easier to observe a holiday, than keep Faith”.

•    the moment you admit to have an “Open mind”, trust a lot of people to try dump their garbage into yours…

•    At that price to acquire a shoe, the “Choo” is you, not “JImmy”….

•    “The Paki butt has been busted by the English pricks”… News of the world for you today…

•    Lady gaga decided to perform during the halloween weekend. Coincidence?

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