Quotes

•    I am experiencing Tryst deficit with destiny this Independence day.

•    Thanks for the SMS – “Happy Independence day. Wanted/ Available 3 BHK flats cheap prices, dont regret tomorrow when price rise. We also do renting”

•    Kalmadi says that there are 2000 committed, capable, honest people working in CWG. So, why not lose one and allow 1999 to create a successful CWG?

•    Drain the rainwater, NOT the Money. A matter of interpretation.

•    The sacrificial goat & Darbari would eat the Shera & Maharaja of ConMan wealth games

•    Momota assures Bongal of Gobhernance instead of Governance. Some change to start with. We can expect Bhellbeing & Bhelth promises soon

•    Long back, Girls used to cook like their mothers. Now, they drink like their fathers. Times change on Twitter…

•    Rewards are directly proportional to the source of wealth, between the ears

•    CWG news Update: Toilet paper wud be replaced wuth Sand paper now.

•    Ratan tata wants to retire at 75 while Indian sports administrators start at 75. Did we hear anyone uttering fitness?

•    9.75 lakhs for a tread mill is justified since One guy comes along, to maintain, use & train on treadmill. How about expensive Toilet paper? Anything packaged?

•    Sheila-Kalmadi Duet – “Dum Dum DIGa digA, mausam bheega bheega”… is barsaat mein saara CP khod diya…

•    Rim jhim gire saawan, sulag sulag jaaye Monk…

•    Come October, Delhi might have to set aside wealth to draw the common man to watch kalmadi games.

•    A self made man worships his creator, till he becomes to tail which wagged the Ass..

•    talk “to” people, than “about” them…. that should solve a few issues to start with

•    The stress of not having to worry on anything is getting to me now…

•    I always wanted a ‘six pack of my own”. Went straight to the shop & bought six packs of Beer !!!

•    Basanti, in “Blackdogs” ke saamne mat naachna.

•    The old monk walked.

•    0/1 in SriLanka. India in ‘gambhir samasya’ now

•    Utterly, Buttery, Malicious !!!!

•    If practice makes a Man perfect, what perfects a woman? Bolo-bolo !!!!

•    TOI frontpage headline today- Pakistan tops in internet search for Horse sex, donkey sex, camel sex etc. “AMAN KI ASHA” a reality now.

•    Prefer to spend a couple of hours with Madira, than Mandira. At least, the Madira doesnt give a headache.

•    Kerala to be renamed Keralam. Henceforth, we would only have Strikam, Bandham, nuisanceam and problam for touristam

•    How can people have ‘small talk’ for hours? What’s small about it anyways..

•    Age matters only if you are ‘wine’ OR ‘cheese’

•    Ofcourse I remember u!!!:) It has been ages since we met…. How are things going on at your end… How are Manju chechi, Aakansha and Krish doing…. Convey my regards to them….

•    Beauty is in the eyes of the beer holder (heard on twitworld)

•    all gods are created Equal, &, all men are Cremated equal…

•    The orange peeled me. A tentacled feeling of deja vu-vu-zela

•    got drunk…blew smoke..peeled oranges…

•    Dutchkeong, dutchkeong…..

•    Paul the Pus calculates like Shakuntala Devi, contorts like Ramdev, pouts like Narsimha Rao and acts like SRK. he wud be a good act here…

•    Sri Sri Sri Octopus. The art of predicting.

•    I have a good handle on life. It’s just that the handle has come unstuck

•    Thoda gyan from me also now on FB – “Philosophy of Life – Dread one day at a time, that helps things from shredding”. Lol

•    BCCI serves another notice on Lalit Modi for having a pet Octopus in the IPL office

•    Sensibilities under attack last nite. I hate Luv storys

•    Bandh since morning. Those irritating telecalls selling loans “bandh”. Those free advice calls “bandh”. Those who want to drop in “Bandh”. Jiski bandh, woh ghar
•    mein Bandh. Silver lining of bandh.

•    “The middle finger”. Hand of god have strange ways of silencing the big mouths

•    Didnt realize while buying – Wrinkle free meant “free wrinkles”

•    Now that Sharad Pawar has gone to ICC, lets make Lalit Modi the Food minister. There would be some semblance of management

•    Tiger woods beats the costliest ‘procreation effort’ record. “Na ghar ka, na ‘haath’ ka”

•    Resume on Naukri.com – Professional stone thrower with 6 years hands on experience in Kashmir. Well versed with six sigma tools against security forces. 88% accuracy. Additional exp. in toppling & burning police vans.

•    Ramesh Menon went to GIREM Pune – Infrastructure Business Connect Summit.

•    I know one cant compare “apple to Orange”. Can I try “Apple & Blackberry”

•    Aren’t our gross habits exceeding the net incomes? Is that what is meant by “embracing Amreekan culture”?

•    God is great and satiated. Even then, we throw money at him, and try and “bend him like Beckham”

•    Thoda philosophy – Please say no to plastics. Please ask for cotton / Jute. Please be aware of your rights & duties. What are the bloody options? Rakhee Sawant & Sherlyn Chopra? Both avoid cotton & Jute. Plastic embedded..oops, silicon

•    The secret revealed. Braking news. Why is Australia better than India in every sport. (courtesy Faking News)

•    so much of hollow gyaan & philosophy floating on Fb. Wonder if the ‘karta’, ‘kathni’, ‘ & ‘karni’ are in sync?

•    Never argue with Idiots. They pull U down to their level & beat U with their experience and expertise ~ Wise man sayeth

•    “Good evening” is the only good news that the newsreaders utter. For the rest, the Vuvuzela sounds better

•    Kashmir issue is like 22 players running all over the ground, kicking ‘balls’ not sure if there is a goal

•    Multi tasking is nothing but screwing multiple tasks at the same time, OR, screwing the same task multiple times.

•    One lady was taken to Srilanka centuries back. We still talking about her chastity and fire-test. ANother lady screwed the nation 35 yrs back, we refrain debate. Fair?

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